Puff Revisited

We sing a lot of Puff, the Magic Dragon at our house.

The kids were up late tonight, and even after one of the twins had fallen asleep, the other one wanted me to go in and sing to him. It was about 11:00.

I went into their room, climbed into his bed and lay down next to him. We nuzzled noses and bonked heads and he giggled. This happened a few times and then I asked him what he wanted me to sing.

"Puff. Puffy."

So we started to sing, and I watched his big blue eyes and his long lashes in the low light in his bedroom from the gingerbread train that lights up in all different colors.

And there is a line, every time, that wrenches me in that song when my boys are singing along and I get to listen to their voices. It is this:

"A dragon lives forever, but not so little boys..."

We sang that tonight, and his little voice came in on forever and little boys. Really, my heart hurts each time. What he doesn't realize is that he is that little boy for me. When I hear him and his brother sing that at the top of their lungs, they don't realize that they are growing. They don't realize how sweet and how dear they are. They can't know how much they are engraving in my heart.

I feel a quiet and definite sadness in this.

But, one day, I will tell them about it when I am missing the snuggle time I have now, late at night, with my three-year-olds.

I will tell them how much it means to me now. I hope I can remember the details. And I hope that somehow, even though they are growing, this love grows deeper and sweeter.

It is what matters most.

And, as a post script, I sang in a Christmas program that my dad has organized tonight. It has been happening for 30 years now. And I can't really put words to what happened there, but the Spirit was electrifying. The music was beautiful, and there is something magical that happens when the beautiful texts you are singing proclaim honest, simple, breathtaking truth. And the poetry...oh the poetry! I can't recommend this book highly enough.

(Voices of Christmas by Nikki Grimes)

It touched me through and through and after all that beauty in one evening I left with my heart aching and full.

Who couldn't rejoice for the message of the angels and the shepherds and the prophets about the Savior of the world?

New Pics of the Boys

Benj came up the stairs yesterday with my sports bra around his neck.

Love this pic

This is exactly what he looks like when he is pleased and/or surprised.

So cute. (Detail of sports bra around neck.)

Lovin' These Boys

Isaiah

'Saiah

Brothers

Love this picture of Benj.

Sitting at the front window watching the cars go by.

Benj

Playing with their garden tool set in the backyard.

Benji

So dang cute!

All right, I'm a little partial, but aren't they so dang cute?!!

It warms my heart

Bathtime

This is one of the things I like to do while the boys are in the bath.

Boys in bath equals time for me to sit by the bathtub, play the guitar and sing.

This morning's playlist included:

Morning Song for Sally by Jerry Jeff Walker

Talk To Me While I'm Listening by Nanci Griffith

Across the Great Divide (Nanci Griffith does a cover of this song...I don't know who the song writer is)

You've Got A Friend by James Taylor

Why An Old Sink Should Hang Around

This is Isaiah's idea of a good time.

Mine too.

October in Visual Review

A child looking at ruins grows younger
but cold
and wants to wake to a new name
I have been younger in October
than in all the months of spring
walnut and may leaves the color
of shoulders at the end of summer
a month that has been to the mountain
and become light there
the long grass lies pointing uphill
even in death for a reason
that none of us knows
and the wren laughs in the early shade now
come again shining glance in your good time
naked air late morning
my love is for lightness
of touch foot feather
the day is yet one more yellow leaf
and without turning I kiss the light
by an old well on the last of the month
gathering wild rose hips
in the sun

- W. S. Merwin, The Love of October

Benj's first haircut (before and after)

Walks around town -- noticing the trees

Up the canyon

Taking engagement photos for my sister Christa who is getting married next month

(This is one of the cheap ones with my digital camera. We took about 100 with a really nice one.)

Blissful boys... (gotta love it while it lasts)

Cute little niece Anna with Scott

My whole world

Isaiah

Benjamin

Me and the boys

Time with family...

The babes with their aunties Alli and Dara (also babes)

Alli, Dara and Me (sisters-in-law)

My nephew Zac's soccer game

Nate holding Isaiah, Ben holding Ben, and Tyler

Zac and Isaiah

Junebug

Me with the two Bens

Ashlynn

Daffodil

I love this picture of Isaiah with his dada

And, bringing up the very end of the month...my new haircut (and color -- something I've never done before!!):

What did you do in October?